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Aviianna-Points

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My good friend(sister:D) has asked me to try and get her some critiques on a piece of writing... She is quite talented and wants to improve in every way.

She is aspiring to be a writer but needs help.
Her piece is here psychobluephoenix.deviantart.c…
It's part one of her 3 part bit which will then extend into a big novel... apparently ^^


She hasn't got a critique bit up because she isn't a PM but in comments will please her, I hope:D

Thank you guys.
Everyone who helps her out will get a little gift from me :iconwinkwinkplz:
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( )Smoked.
( ) Drank alcohol.
(x) Cried when someone died.
( ) Been drunk.
( ) Had sex.
( ) Been to a concert.
( ) gotten/given a hand-job.
( ) gotten/given a blow-job.
(x) Been verbally/sexually harassed.
( ) Verbally/sexually harassed somebody. (For both of these, it was my friends and I....I need new friends)

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 98%

( ) Felt someone up and/or been felt up.
( ) Laughed so hard something came out of your nose.
( ) Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
( ) Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend.
( ) Been to prom.
(x) Cried at school.
( ) Gotten lost in a Wal-Mart or a department store. (It was a big store....and I saw 3 and with my dad.)
( ) Went streaking.
( ) Given or received a lap dance.
(x) Had someone of the opposite sex in your room.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 96%

(x) Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over.
(x) Slept over at someone of the opposite sex's house.
( ) Kissed a stranger.
( ) Hugged a stranger.
( ) Went scuba diving.
(x) Driven a car.
(x) Gotten an x-ray.
( ) Hit by a car.
(x) Had a party.
( ) Done serious drugs.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 91%

( ) Played strip poker/darts.
( ) Got paid to strip for someone.
( ) Run away from home.
(x) Broken a bone.
(x) Eaten sushi.
( ) Bought porn.
( ) Watched porn.
( ) Made porn.
( ) Had a crush on someone of the same sex.
( ) Been in love.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 89%

( ) Made Out.
(x) Laughed so hard you cried.
(x) Cried yourself to sleep.
( ) Laughed yourself to sleep.
( ) Stabbed yourself.
(x) Shot a gun
(x) Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day.
( ) Been online for 9 consecutive hours.
(x) Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours.
(x) Watched an animal die.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 83%

( ) Watched a person die.
( ) Kissed and/or messed around somewhere with at least 1 person in the same room
(x) Pranked somebody.
( ) Put somebody in the hospital.
( ) Snuck into someone's room and/or your own room after being out.
( ) Kissed somebody of the same sex.
( ) Dressed punk.
( ) Dressed goth.
( ) Dressed preppy.
( ) Been to a motocross race.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 82%

(x) Avoided somebody.
(x) Been stalked. (in a friendly way)
( ) Stalked someone.
( ) Met a celebrity.  
(x) Played an instrument. ( I used to. )
( ) Ridden a horse.
(x) Cut yourself. (accidently, not purposeful)
( ) Bungee jumped.
( ) Ding dong ditched somebody.
( ) Been to a wild party.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 78%

( ) Got caught stealing something.
( ) Kicked/punched a guy in the balls.
( ) Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend.
( ) Gone out with your friend's crush.
( ) Got arrested.
( ) Been pregnant.
( ) Babysat. (Dog sitting right now...Does that count)
( ) Been to another country.
( ) Started your house on fire.
( ) Had an encounter with a ghost.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 78%

( ) Donated your hair to cancer patients.
(x) Been asked out by someone that you never thought you'd be asked out by.
(x) Cried over a member of the opposite sex. (alot...Usually at night)
( ) Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 3 months.
(x) Sat on your butt all day.
( ) Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself. (I was watching the full season of House, and yea...)
(x) Had a job.(have one)
( ) Gotten cut from a sports team.
( ) Been called a whore. (Friends, yet again)
( ) Danced like a whore.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 74%

(x) Been mistaken as older than your own age.  
( ) Been in a car accident.
(x) Been told you have beautiful eyes.
(x) Been told you have beautiful hair.
( ) Raped somebody.
(x) Danced in the rain.
(x) Been rejected.
( ) Walked out of a restaurant without paying.
(x) Punched someone/slapped someone in the face.
( ) Been raped.

Final = 68% Virgin

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New Username!

Hello, since I got given a PM and I gave one cause I'm nice, I decided to use it to change my Username. Since I am the sole admin and now a blooming points donator, I decided to fix up my Username!


Also I love this skin:D

If you want points from me(basically for free) all you hav eto do is join my group :iconwinning-points:

Then ask there:D

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For my kennel to put in this group :iconkennel-club:

Our kennel focused on breeding mixed and pure-bred pups as well as rescuing abandoned and injured dogs for other to give a great home. We strive for only the best care for all of our dogs and if we don’t think the home they’re going to is good, they will not go. There are too many ignorant and ignoring owners out there; and too many abusive owners as well. So come on in and see a wide range of species.

Focused Breeds-

German Shepards

Siberian Huskies

Jack Russell Terriers(not yet)

Labrador Retrievers

Border Collies(not yet)

Breeding Rules

Well, I’m new to kennel breeding, but I have done cat breeding on my other account :iconnyxhime:. So, I’m going to set it up kind of the same way. Basically, I will do 2 TYPES of breeding.

1-      You can ask me to pair one of your male or female dogs with one of my dogs of the opposite gender. The resulting litter will have between 4-7 pups. This one will only cost 3 :points: because you are supplying one of the dogs. The resulting litter will be yours, although, if I have a favourite I may ask to keep one. If you do not want any of them , I will either rebreed them or refund the points, so you can’t lose. If there are any you don’t want, they WILL be put up for adoption.

2-      You can ask for any 2 of my dogs, a male and a female, and I’ll breed them, with the resulting litter having between 4 and 7 pups. This one will cost 5 :points: as I am supplying both dogs. The same rules apply as a above, if you do not want any of them , I will either rebreed them or refund the points, so you can’t lose. If there are any you don’t want, they WILL be put up for adoption.


Full name: Duststorm racer
Call name: Dusty
Breed: Siberian Husky

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-bred
Gender/Sex: Female
Age: 3 years
Personality: Fiesty and excitable but can be very well behaved when she has to be.
Bloodline: Father-Moku(deceased) Mother-Raina(deceased) Siblings-Black Jack(Lives far away)
Discipline:  She does agility trials and excels at Frisbee. Although she has trouble staying still in simple obedience. She is best at jumping. Very, very fast.
Breeding status: Open

Link-

Full name:  Muck starchaser
Call name:  Muck
Breed: Siberian Husky

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-bred
Gender/Sex: Male
Age: 3 and a half years
Personality: Quiet and self-controlled. Very obedient and is never CAUGHT doing the wrong thing, although, he is fond of snagging snacks.His head is always in the stars.
Bloodline: Father-Jojo(Elderly, lives with a family) Mother-Rabel(deceased) Siblings-Maya (Lives far away) Ridlo(Lives far away)
Discipline:  He is intelligent and open minded, he excels at obedience style events. But his strong solid structure also gives him an edge in sledding events as well. He follows direction to the key.
Breeding status: Open

Link-


Full name:  Ricocheting Arrow
Call name:  Ricky
Breed: Labrador retriever

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-bred
Gender/Sex: Male
Age: 2 and half years
Personality: Fun loving and playful, but if you hurt him, he’ll retaliate exactly the same way. That’s why his name is Richochet, meaning to bounce back or away from impact.
Bloodline: Unknown Bloodline, he was found abandonded

 Discipline:  None in the kennel are yet to suit him, he’s only been there 3 weeks.

Breeding status: Open

Link-


Full name:  Weaving Contimnuum
Call name:  Weavy
Breed: Labrador retriever

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-bred
Gender/Sex: Female
Age: 4 years
Personality: Sweet motherly and a great family pet. She can excel at anything she puts her mind down to.
Bloodline: She is from royal Russian heritage. Her great grandmother was owned by a princess in Russia about 35 years again.

 Discipline: 

Breeding status: Open

Link-


Full name:  Berry Bush
Call name:   Berries
Breed: German Sheppard Dog

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-breed(Genetics)
Gender/Sex: Female
Age: 3 and half years
Personality: Sweet as a strawberry and very smart. She is named for her temperament and for the fact that she loves all kinds of fruits. She is a very well trained dog.
Bloodline: She was rescued, not known family.

 Discipline: Obedience Trials suit her best.

Breeding status: Open

Link-


Full name:  Smudged Colours
Call name:   Smudge
Breed: German Sheppard Dog

Breed Percentages: 100% Pure-breed(genetics)
Gender/Sex: Male
Age: 3 years
Personality: Fast paced and somewhat stupid at times. If he’s not in the mood he pretends not to understand the commands given to him, even though he does. Very, VERY fast and a magnificent jumper and a very agile dog.
Bloodline: Rescued

 Discipline: Agility contests, races. Could match the speed of a greyhound.

Breeding status: Open

Link-fav.me/d5gq81p


Full name:  Small spots
Call name:  Spots
Breed: Labrador retriever

Breed Percenatge: 100% Pure-bred
Gender/Sex: Female
Age: about 4 years
Personality: Quiet and withdrawn most of the time due to her past in abusive homes. But, when she feels like if, she can move fast and is very wily.
Bloodline: Rescued

 Discipline: Running, chasing, jumping events.

Breeding status: Open

Link-


Full name:  Skyfalling Wren
Call name:   Wren
Breed: Siberian Husky mix

Breed Percentages: 80%Siberian Husky 11% Alaskan Malamute and 9% Border Collie
Gender/Sex: Female
Age: 3 Years
Personality: Intellegent good attention span. Willing to learn, can be anti-social toward dogs and other humans he doesn’t know well.
Bloodline: 
Mother:Foreign Frontiers' s Nothing Can Afford me! 
Father:Wise Trooper Kennels' s Highly Intelligent Sociopath 

 Discipline: obedience events with many complex tricks and commands.

Breeding status: Open

Link-

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Hi guys.
I promise I'm NOT dead! I'm so sorry about being offline so much. School is hectic, like I mean HECTIC! I have challenged myself to at least double the A's from my last report card (3 this time so 6 next time). The problem here being I now need to TRY! UGH! So I spend time studying, doing homework PLUS working. So, I will be offline ALOT! Sorry guys.

Bye for now, I will be on, just not a lot.
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